I may have feathers, but I'm no chicken

(This is a worthwhile video, but if you don't have 18 min. here's a quote to sum it up)

" we are educating people out of their creative capacities. Picasso once said this -- he said that all children are born artists. The problem is to remain an artist as we grow up. I believe this passionately, that we don't grow into creativity, we grow out of it. Or rather, we get educated out if it."

So I have come to this conclusion, well not so much a conclusion, more of a premonition. It came to me during a class discussion last week with my period 7 class. This is my best class in terms of discussion and sharing ideas and feelings. The discussion came from a conversation I saw on the NY Times website about if The Hunger Games should be considered more than just a Young Adult book. One literary snob said "The only thing more embarrassing than a grown man getting caught with porn on an airplane is getting caught reading The Hunger Games." So I printed the varying opinions out and brought them in to hear what my class had to say. The conversation was very good and eventually made its way to how I taught The Hunger Games and what they liked and did not like. One girl, very tactfully, began to complain that she wishes we had done more fun things with the book. Other teams had had mock HUnger Games with competition and prizes and costumes and the whole time Im thinking "that sounds like such a waste of time." But as I scanned the room I saw many students nodding in agreement. My premonition: maybe I am not fun enough for middle school.

You see as an English major, and a rather intellectual one at that, I cannot think of anything more fun than sitting around analyzing a book in a class discussion and then writing a paper relating that book to a current issue. What I forget is, I did not enjoy that sort of thing in middle school. Now this has two sides. 1) Students need outlets for creativity and movement in companion to text because that helps them learn. But also 2) the reason I did not enjoy these things in middle school was no one ever gave me the opportunity to do them, I am of the strong belief that our student will rise to the expectations and challenges we set for them. But for the sake of this post lets focus on the first.

So, tomorrow I am stretching myself, because I refuse to be "not fun enough for middle school." If my kids want creative fun, they shall have it! We are currently reading The Light in the Forest (Native American novel) so tomorrow we are going to have our usual end of book writing assignment and discussion. BUT there will be a twist. In addition we are going to make indian headdresses, complete with feathers and beads and all kinds of stuff. Our discussion is going to become a pow-wow. Kids will share their thoughts as native tribes did. We will eat goldfish and popcorn (symbols of the Native American dietary staples), and we will soak in the themes and language a novel that I know they all hate.

My hope for this class is that they take something worthwhile away from the book, and have fun. I went to a craft store today to get supplies and spent a lot of time at school cutting out the ugliest feathers you have ever seen. For me this is a step out of my comfort zone. It's something that I do not do well, and honestly I don't see as being that beneficial. But I know my kids will enjoy it, and I know it will stretch their mind in a different sort of way. And I for one am willing to take a risk for that opportunity for learning.

Green Books

So as you may have noticed, I have not been writing on this thing as much; partly because I am really busy, and partly because since I am in the classroom everyday, I am running out of monumental experiences to talk about on daily basis. You see, I don't want this to be a diary where I simply report what I do each day, I prefer it to be a platform to share what I am learning. As I always tell my students, one of the best ways to learn is to read.

Another reason I don't write on here as regularly is I have a lack of free time. Between my class and my teaching and working, I really only have time to watch a couple of TV shows a week and maybe take a nap. Recently an Ed professor explained to me the importance of taking time for yourself, to relax and sort of center yourself.

So this brings me to my new idea for this blog. Aside from writing about my classroom, I am also going to use this space to tell you about learning I am doing through reading. Now because I don't have a lot of money, I am going to do what I call green books. You see my book shelf has at least 20 books on that I have not read; in fact its probably more like 30-40. So I am going to take the time to read nightly and reflect on what I have read on this blog. I am also going to open this up to my friends on facebook and see if they want to join my green books movement; and I encourage you all to do it too.

Turning Point

" But man is not made for defeat. A man can be destroyed, but not defeated." - Ernest Hemingway

So there is a lot going on this week that ties together to make me feel a bit down. Obviously there is the PSSA testing which really is soul crushing. Along with that the air conditioning and fans are broken in the school so it is ridiculously hot and stuffy in there during the day, a lot of my kids failed the Social Justice paper, kids are becoming very lazy and my supervisor basically told me that he is not going to be around much this next half of the year so basically I passed. The sum of all of this is making it very tough to get motivated to get up and go the rest of this week; let alone the rest of this year.

The thing that is most troubling is that these kids really do not see value in school. They want the easy way out, they don't want to do work. I get that; I was that way when I was in school too. But I assumed I was the exception. That kids would flock to me and love my style and just get swept up in learning. They do love me (most of them) but I can't say they love my class, or the material. It's discouraging to put your heart into something and feel unappreciated. I can remember times when I was younger, actually maybe I wasn't so young, when would hurt my parents feelings and they would give me this look that just embodied how deflated they were. Like they had such high hopes for something and I just pulled the carpet out from them. I feel that same look this week when I look out onto a class of students who just want to be done, who just want easy.

The funny thing is my parents were really good at disguising that look. They would let it show for a moment and then they would look away or leave the room, and soon they'd be back with something else, as if it never happened. I need to learn that trick. I need to hide my deflation and just take another approach. Because thats what you do when you have great passion and love; you don't give up, you regroup. I think a lot of this feeling has to do with being tired, and knowing that most of my friends are on Spring Break and I'm stuck sweating in PSSAville. EIther way I am hoping to take this weekend to regroup and refresh.

Now I know a lot of people are itching to call or text me at this point to cheer me up, but I would rather you just comment on this post about a time you changed an approach or about a positive experience you had as a student. I always bounce back, I just need some time with me.

"This is going to hurt me more than it hurts you"

It's a sad week for teachers and students alike this week, it's PSSA week. The first three day installment of standardized tests, that last from 7:50-11:30. As a passionate educator I nearly get sick at the sight of 20 kids dead silent, filling in bubbles that will determine their school's state ranking, future classes, state funding and perhaps even their teacher's job. These tests are somewhat of a necessary evil; they are here and they are not going away, so we might as well just take them. They are just hoops we need to jump through. But it's not that simple. These tests are poisoning our education system. They are meant to suck creativity out of schools so that all kids get the same education and learn the same thing, the same way.

This goes back to the McDonalds post I had a couple weeks ago. Anyone who has been in a school can tell you that "standardized" anything is a joke. If you approach period 1 the same as period 6 your losing kids;it's that simple. So it goes with out saying that if thats the case, we also cannot expect that kids in Lancaster need the same things as kids in Philly and none of them need what kids in Texas need. In fact, what would a world of standardized learners look like? A concrete curriculum for every grade in every state? So every 11th grader takes pre-calculus and reads The Crucible? When you align yourself with a standardized anything, your ruining diversity that fuels learning.

The worst part about these tests is that they are not effective. They are impossible for some students and not nearly challenging enough for others. They only work for one learning type, they are way too long and they do not encompass any life long learning skills that I would actually value. No culture; no critical thinking; no building or problem solving; no collaboration and no research. These tests are nothing more than a wealthy politicians solution to a problem he knows nothing about. They are also a way for that same politician to make money. Standardized testing is a billion dollar industry, monopolized by a few companies, creating tests that determine the education of millions of students and jobs of teachers and administrators nationwide. All of this dictated by passing a test that is mathematically designed for 50% to fail. The House always wins.

Lessons I Hope We Never Stop Teaching

As my course load has now been reduced, I am now teaching 3 classes a day rather than 6, I have had the chance to watch my co-op teach. While I am teaching a novel unit on The Light in the Forest, he is guiding them through a research paper. Their paper is on prejudice. They must research an instance of historical prejudice/discrimination/intolerance etc. It flows rather nicely with my social justice paper. To introduce this unit, he uses the Holocaust. The kids mostly complained because they are also reading Anne Frank in their reading classes and they will learn about the Holocaust again in 10th grade. But my co-op was duel history/english ed major so he take advantage of this time to draw on another one of his passions.

One of the things he uses is a video of Oprah interviewing Elie Weisel at Auscwitz. If you do not know Elie Weisel, and/or you have not read his memoir "Night," than you are doing yourself a disservice. Hands down it is one of the most important books written in the last 30 years. The video takes two class periods to watch, and at times it is quite chilling. Some kids drag their feet and complain that this is too depressing to watch first period, and it is very heavy. But as I sat watching it for the third time, I realized a couple of things. 1) I was not able to grade any papers during this video, even after multiple/consecutive viewings. I hung on his words as if they were gospel. 2) I could have heard a pin drop in every class. 3) First hand accounts like this are becoming more and more vital. We have all heard that it is necessary to study history so it does not repeat itself. I was spoiled as a child. My grandfather fought in WWII and liberated Dachau. I have known about these horrors. But this generation, the greatest generation, is quickly withering away. When our kids hear about this from a teacher or read it in a book, its sad, boring history; when they see someone who lived through it, it's real.

Something about teaching makes me pretty emotional. On more than one occasion in the classroom I have been touched, nearly to the point of tears, and today was another one of those days. The emotion of the video and the solemnity of the classroom was remarkable. The catch phrase associated with the holocaust is "Never Forget." I never truly understood the weight and magnitude of that phrase until today. I would encourage you all to take time to watch this interview ( I must say it's worth it, even as an Oprah hater) and read his book. Heres a clip of the first part, watch as much as you want, but I warn you... 10 min will go quick

And then there was Tuesday..

"No drug, not even alcohol, causes the fundamental ills of society. If we're looking for troubles, we shouldn't test people for drugs, we should test them for stupidity, ignorance, greed and love of power."

Teaching is the most frustrating, tiring thing I have ever done. But it is also the most rewarding, fulfilling thing I have ever done. Everyday I set my alarm for 5:15, and nearly everyday I wake up at about 5:13 and lay there anxiously anticipating the day to come. Somedays I get pretty deflated. For instance, we just finished The Hunger Games and, as I have said, I introduced a project on social justice. Honestly, there was a lot of complaining. In hindsight I may have overachieved a bit, actually I don't buy that. I think a lot of teachers don't push their students near hard enough and as a result students have no idea of their true potential. Either way, certain kids whined a lot and wanted to do a test or a poster (as I said, no idea of their true potential). This at first was disheartening, then it was annoying and finally it really pissed me off. I was really excited to instill a sense of social conscience in my students. To watch them latch on to a passion and run with it. But all they really wanted was easy.

But today, something changed. We started our social justice speeches. Hearing the kids talk about these issues, and how they conflict with who they are and what they believe in, and what they, personally, did (not could do, or will do, but did do) was really inspiring. One girl wrote the white house expressing her outrage with the IOM guidelines accepted by the HHS in Obama Care forcing religious groups to provide money fro abortions , contraceptives and morning after pills. Another student created a blog about Hunger in the local area. A boy from my afternoon classes made a T-shirt that read "ASK ME ABOUT CHILDREN IN ARMED CONFLICT." On the back he had about 20 shocking statistics about the horrors done to children in parts Africa that force them to fight in rebellions and uprisings. Another girl had a bake sale to benefit children in third world countries born with a cleft lip or palate. One surgery costs $250. She raised $300.

Those are just some that stand out. Many students created websites, posted on facebook, tweeted or sent mass text messages spreading awareness about things like huner in somalia, genocide in Darfur, the inadequacies in the meat industry, bullying, gay rights, the food system and it's link to obesity and many other issues. Other students donated food to shelters, sent money via a website, hung poster in the class or made a petition. I made it clear from the start that this was not about how grandiose the action was, it was simply about acting. Seeing a problem and doing something. I'm sure a lot of student did the easiest thing they could, and that's fine. Other's I hope have found a passion that they will continue to harvest and make people aware of. Either way Tuesday was enough for me to be reignited. Kids are always going to want to take the easy way out, hell i think we all prefer the path of least resistance. However, I truely believe that by following what I believe to be right, teaching according to my personal pedagogy, that my students will learn. Maybe not the day I assign the project, maybe not the day they give their speech, but one day, I hope, they will learn. My mentor from Philly siad "Spencer, there are hundreds of kids out there who learned from me, and that feels amazing." Today I finally grasped a small part of that.

If kids were value meals, this system would be golden

I went to Penn State this weekend to visit my friend lexy and participate in their yearly State Paddies Day shenanigans. On the way up me and one of my best friends, Fritz, stopped at McDonalds for dinner. As we sat there chowing down on copious amounts of greasy goodness, Fritz said "You know what's comforting, the fact that I can eat at a Mcdonalds in PA, California or China and my food will taste the same." I had never thought of this before, or at least I had never truly thought about it. Mcdonalds, despite any personal views you may have on them based on animal rights, health concerns or product quality, has mastered continuity and consistency.

And this, is the perfect analogy for the current education system. In fact, it ha been the goal and the aim of education for years. In the industrial revolution schools naturally adapted to the factory system. Increments of work, lunch break, bells, asking superiors permission to use the bathroom, all of it was meant to prepare individuals for a factory job. Today, our aims are a bit higher, but not really any more noble. We strive higher education and rigorous standards, and we implement things like standardized tests tell us where our students are collectively and how well they are being taught by professionals.

The problem of course is unlike industry, this is not a field that can be controlled with standards and testing, because we deal with different raw materials. McDonalds has mastered their burger because they figured out a way to put the same product everywhere. Every McDonalds starts with the same burger and fries. They brew the same coffee and they wear the same uniform. However it is completely unrealistic to believe that this sort of continuity can be obtained in districts 5 miles apart let alone within the walls of the same school. I am increasingly shocked at how different my students are. In good ways and bad ways. For instance things like "levels" are a myth. There is no "8th grade" reading or writing level. I have kids who can write a 5 source research paper in a couple days and I have kids that can barely write an introduction paragraph. I have kids who can read a classroom novel in 2 days and others that need 4 weeks. Here's the thing, they both matter. They both need affirmation. ANd they are both capable of learning.

The AYP judges kids based on where they should be and also on growth of every student. Growth is a wonderful thing, we should embrace it and celebrate it. What is concerning is the emphasis grade level standards. Because some kids can't meet those standards, not in a year. They aren't lazy, or stupid or retarded, they just are on a different level. But they deserve to be affirmed for their accomplishments just the same. Because the more I see, the more I am convinced that self-efficacy is most of the battle. If kids believe they are going to fail, they will. If you make them believe they will succeed then get ready.

This gets us into a whole different topic, grades. I'm an easy grader, and I don't grade things often. A lot of students don't like that. Our factory system has taught them that grades equal pay check, would you go into work and do things if you weren't getting paid? Not if you worked in a factory. Now if you worked in a field that you loved, that fulfilled you, you just might. This is what I strive for with English. I want it to be a reaffirming exoerience every time a student reads a novel or writes a paper. Grades sometimes hinder that though. You see often grades are a ranking. So if the smartest kid gets an A+ on a paper, than naturally everyone else will get below that right? Now what about the kid who entered the class and had never written more than an intro? What if he turns in a 3 page paper? COmpared to my A+ student that paper's probably about a C-. But compared to his previous work? Well compared to that he just did more than he ever has in his life, and he did it well. So what do I give him?

All A's would be awesome. Effort=grades and if you waste your talent, then your wasting my time and I'm not going to grade it. Give it back to me when you did your best and you'll get the best I can give you. Sweet philosophy huh? Linda Christenson, a teacher from Portland Oregon, works in some f the worst districts, and she has that policy. In inner city it's awesome, because it brings out the best. In fact, Id argue it brings out the best in anyone. But would it work in more affluent districts? Districts with high taxes and competitive academics? Districts where parents actually look at report cards and call the principal everytime they feel their kid is being cheated? You see we're not Mcdonalds, our raw materials aren't the same; the people who recognize that often don't feel comfortable with prime rib getting the same recognition as a quarter pounder.

This a tricky issue, and as you can see I don't have a concrete solution. I'm not at all suggesting that we should keep standards low and reward kids for low achievement. What I am saying is that affirming kids for what they are capable of and then challenging, and expecting them to improve is the only standard I need to adhere to. And if the people making laws recognized that, I don't think we'd even need standardized tests. No one wants to under achieve, they just don't know how to get to the top of a ladder with missing rungs.